Comparing yourself to others is a sign you need to do this

Photo by Dietmar Becker on Unsplash

You’re probably familiar with the phrase “comparison is the thief of joy.” But can you really avoid comparison? Especially when it comes to the bigger material possessions like houses & cars that you see in your neighborhood every day?

Comparison is a very natural and human thing we all seem to do and trying to avoid it feels like a bit of a fool’s errand to me. So what can one do about this conundrum?

I think rather than trying – and failing! – to avoid comparison, you can accept that making comparisons is inevitable. That acceptance also presents an opportunity to refocus your attention back towards what matters uniquely to you. 

Now to be clear, if you haven’t yet defined what uniquely matters to you, comparison will continue to be a thief of joy in your life. After all, it’s easy to spot your neighbor with a bigger house and nicer car than yours. But that’s only because without a clearly defined set of personal values and priorities, you tend to default to using your neighbor as your guide.

When you have clarity around what matters to you, it becomes much easier to say “good for them” when you find yourself making a comparison rather than going straight to asking yourself why you don't have what they have. You instead recall the intentional choices you’ve made around what matters most to you.

So if you find yourself constantly making comparisons to the people around you, treat that realization as a warning sign. 

You need to clearly define your personal set of values & priorities. 

The more you do, the less likely you are to find yourself living someone else’s life by mistake.